The other night in MiM world, I was on Severus's page (as usual) and he had gotten drunk from drinking too much firewhiskey at the pool party and wedding. So me and my friends were hanging out with him in his office, and he decided to tell us this story:
"This tale takes place in Texas. I was wearing a cowboy hat and boots at the time...
On second thought, I don't want to tell it. It's too incriminating. Lucius would die of humiliation if he ever found out that I shared our little story with Fangirls.
Well, little known fact about me: I enjoy driving Muggle automobiles from time to time. Another little known fact: They're difficult to drive in the dark.
So we were driving along a rural road in San Antonio Texas late one night, and Lucius suddenly yelled at me to pull over... He wanted to steal a stop sign. The Dark Lord values trophies of mischief from the Muggle world.
So, I pulled the car over, and Lucius got out. He then climbed onto the roof, but it wasn't quite close enough to reach the sign. So I backed the car up, and then attempted to move closer. But I misjudged where the road ended and the ditch began. The whole car fell in.
Unfortunately, the ditch was full of rattlesnakes. You might ask why we didn't just raise the windows. Well, the air conditioning in the car was broken, and it was summertime in Texas! We had to make the choice between being eaten by rattlesnakes or suffocating in the heat! Scary, isn’t it?
So we took out our wands and fought our way out. Then we levitated the car out of the ditch. But it had a flat tire, and we weren't certain how to fix it. Eventually we were rescued by a tow truck driver. He charged us $27USD, and laughed at us for not knowing how to change a tire.
Unfortunately, we never did get the sign."
And here's the picture I drew the next day to go along with it:
Well, he passed out almost immediately after telling the story, and my friends and I stayed with him to protect his unconscious body from anyone that might have snuck out of bed. I ended up kissing him on the cheek and then falling asleep on him. He was not very happy in the morning. But he loved my picture.
