This fanfiction is called The Closet, and is a Snape/Hermione fic. While I do prefer Snape/Lily(obviously), and know that Snape would never be with anyone but Lily, him and Hermione is fun to read. And it does sort of make sense. Hermione is a lot like Lily in some ways, like how she's smart and always happy and really kind, and she's always ready to defend him, unlike the others.
Anyway, it's a one-shot about Snape and Hermione being locked in a closet together... and you'll have to read the rest. For some reason, I feel like it could've actually happened- if Lily never existed, anyway. And even though the grammar isn't too good, it's sweet and funny and I command you to turn to page 394 and read it. http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2258315/1/The_Closet
Friday, February 25, 2011
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Snape Quote of the Week #1
Every Thursday, there will be a random quote from any of the books either said by Snape or about Snape.
"Potter attacked me, sir-"
"We attacked each other at the same time!" Harry shouted.
"-and he hit Goyle- look-"
Snape examined Goyle, whose face now resembled something that would have been at home in a book on poisonous fungi.
"Hospital wing, Goyle," Snape said calmly.
"Malfot got Hermione!" Ron said. "Look!"
He forced Hermione to show Snape her teeth- she was doing the best to hide them with her hands, though this was difficult as they had now grown down past her collar. Pansy Parkinson and the other Slytherin girls were doubled up with silent giggles, pointing at Hermione behind Snape's back.
Snape looked coldly at Hermione, then said, "I see no difference."
Hermione let out a wimper; her eyes filled with tears, she turned on her heel and ran, ran all the way up the corridor and out of sight."
Snape is always really sarcastic and mean, especially to Harry, but this was just awesome. You know that rather than getting frustrated with how incompetent students are or being angry with Harry for acting so much like James, this is actually one of those times that Snape is saying something like that just for the sake of being mean. He had no reason for it; there was no educational or Lily-related purpose behind it... it was just mean. Really mean. Mean enough to make Hermione cry, and to have Harry actually want to Crucio him. I honestly wonder why, though... he can't hate Hermione that much. Or maybe he does... she gets pretty annoying. But I also wonder if he was pleased to see her crying and running away, or possibly he liked her(since she's a lot like Lily in some ways), and was saying that to cover it up. Either way, it sucks that this scene wasn't in the movie. It would've been hilarious.
"Potter attacked me, sir-"
"We attacked each other at the same time!" Harry shouted.
"-and he hit Goyle- look-"
Snape examined Goyle, whose face now resembled something that would have been at home in a book on poisonous fungi.
"Hospital wing, Goyle," Snape said calmly.
"Malfot got Hermione!" Ron said. "Look!"
He forced Hermione to show Snape her teeth- she was doing the best to hide them with her hands, though this was difficult as they had now grown down past her collar. Pansy Parkinson and the other Slytherin girls were doubled up with silent giggles, pointing at Hermione behind Snape's back.
Snape looked coldly at Hermione, then said, "I see no difference."
Hermione let out a wimper; her eyes filled with tears, she turned on her heel and ran, ran all the way up the corridor and out of sight."
Snape is always really sarcastic and mean, especially to Harry, but this was just awesome. You know that rather than getting frustrated with how incompetent students are or being angry with Harry for acting so much like James, this is actually one of those times that Snape is saying something like that just for the sake of being mean. He had no reason for it; there was no educational or Lily-related purpose behind it... it was just mean. Really mean. Mean enough to make Hermione cry, and to have Harry actually want to Crucio him. I honestly wonder why, though... he can't hate Hermione that much. Or maybe he does... she gets pretty annoying. But I also wonder if he was pleased to see her crying and running away, or possibly he liked her(since she's a lot like Lily in some ways), and was saying that to cover it up. Either way, it sucks that this scene wasn't in the movie. It would've been hilarious.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Snape Insults YOU #1
This is a weekly post in which I pick a person I hate, whether it be an actor, band, movie/tv character, etc., and Snape insults them until they cry.
This Week: Snape insults Rachel from Glee
"That's funny, Miss Berry... I don't recall asking you to break everyone's eardrums beyond repair in the middle of my class. That's twenty points from Hufflepuff and detention for the rest of this week... My God, you call that singing? I'm sorry, maybe I didn't hear you right, maybe it'll sound better if I let Buckbeak gouge out my ears as well as all the other students. I'm sure it would be the preferred choice, rather than listen to those screams of agony... Oh, it's not supposed to be screaming? You might fit in better with the merpeople in the Lake, then. They share your taste in music. And while you're at it, Miss Berry, you can drop the Potter-attitude, I have enough of it in my other class. It's not all about you, you insolent little prat! Who cares if you don't think your situation is fair? Because in case it has escaped your notice, Miss Berry, life isn't fair. Now leave my classroom at once and don't return until you've found yourself some Felix Felicis or learned how to hold a note. Now, if you excuse me, I have a lunch date with Sue."
This Week: Snape insults Rachel from Glee
"That's funny, Miss Berry... I don't recall asking you to break everyone's eardrums beyond repair in the middle of my class. That's twenty points from Hufflepuff and detention for the rest of this week... My God, you call that singing? I'm sorry, maybe I didn't hear you right, maybe it'll sound better if I let Buckbeak gouge out my ears as well as all the other students. I'm sure it would be the preferred choice, rather than listen to those screams of agony... Oh, it's not supposed to be screaming? You might fit in better with the merpeople in the Lake, then. They share your taste in music. And while you're at it, Miss Berry, you can drop the Potter-attitude, I have enough of it in my other class. It's not all about you, you insolent little prat! Who cares if you don't think your situation is fair? Because in case it has escaped your notice, Miss Berry, life isn't fair. Now leave my classroom at once and don't return until you've found yourself some Felix Felicis or learned how to hold a note. Now, if you excuse me, I have a lunch date with Sue."
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Snape Video of the Week #1
You might be asking yourself, "What do they mean, 'Snape Video'?" Well, I mean any videos having to do with Snape, you dunderhead. And if you haven't heard of Wizard Rock, come out of the Chambers you've been hiding in for centuries(How do you even get internet reception down there?), because a lot of the Snape Videos will be Wizard Rock songs. Basically, it's a genre of music all about the Harry Potter Universe.
Any way, here's this week's video!
It's called 'The Hero Pt. 2-Ministry of Magic-Severus Snape, and was made by boushh2187
It has the song "The Hero Pt. 2" from Ministry of Magic's new album, Magic is Might, and was made for their music video contest.
I absolutely LOVE this song, but love it even more with this video. All the clips are in perfect sync with the music, and fit the lyrics SO much... It's just a little deeper insight on Snape killing Dumbledore from Snape's point of view. We know he struggled so much, and it's heartbreaking, to say the least.
Any way, here's this week's video!
It's called 'The Hero Pt. 2-Ministry of Magic-Severus Snape, and was made by boushh2187
It has the song "The Hero Pt. 2" from Ministry of Magic's new album, Magic is Might, and was made for their music video contest.
I absolutely LOVE this song, but love it even more with this video. All the clips are in perfect sync with the music, and fit the lyrics SO much... It's just a little deeper insight on Snape killing Dumbledore from Snape's point of view. We know he struggled so much, and it's heartbreaking, to say the least.
Monday, February 21, 2011
Weekly Snape-ly Event #1
If this day hadn't landed on a Monday, I still would have posted about it today.
It's Alan Rickman's Birthday!!!
Yes, Alan Rickman, the sexiest man in the world who portrays Severus Snape, turns 65 today. This is the closest thing we can get to Snape's birthday(which was January 9th), but Snape himself would've already been 51 this year...if he hadn't died :'(
This is the most recent picture of him available to the public:
I really think he should get extensions and dye his hair black, though, The Snape hairstyle is awesome.
And this is the youngest picture of him that I could find:
He's about 32 in that picture... Yeah, I know. Wow.
Well, I don't know about you, but I'll be celebrating his birthday by watching Harry Potter as well as other Alan Rickman movies. Once Again, Happy Birthday Alan ! You're the greatest actor that ever lived!
It's Alan Rickman's Birthday!!!
Yes, Alan Rickman, the sexiest man in the world who portrays Severus Snape, turns 65 today. This is the closest thing we can get to Snape's birthday(which was January 9th), but Snape himself would've already been 51 this year...if he hadn't died :'(
This is the most recent picture of him available to the public:
And this is the youngest picture of him that I could find:
Well, I don't know about you, but I'll be celebrating his birthday by watching Harry Potter as well as other Alan Rickman movies. Once Again, Happy Birthday Alan ! You're the greatest actor that ever lived!
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Snape Picture of the Week #1
I really shouldn't have to explain this, but every Sunday I'll post a picture of Snape and my opinion on it. It might be a movie still, a meme, etc.
This is from The Philosopher's Stone('Sorcerer's Stone' in U.S.) during Harry's first Quidditch match. It's before Harry's broom starts going out of control, when the camera is just panning over the Proffesors' Box for theatrical purposes. I think it's important they did that, because it gives us a few seconds worth of Snape, who looks pretty suspicious in this still. He looks like he's anticipating something, and makes us wonder what he's up to. That makes it easier for us to believe he was the one cursing Harry and then feel sorry later for blaming him when we find out it was Quirrel. Speaking of which, if you pay close attention in that scene, Quirrel's not even paying attention, so wtf?
Either way, I love this picture because we get to see Snape in a scarf and his hair blowing in his face, which makes him even SEXIER... How is that even possible?
Either way, I love this picture because we get to see Snape in a scarf and his hair blowing in his face, which makes him even SEXIER... How is that even possible?
Saturday, February 19, 2011
How To Be Like Snape #1
Every Saturday, there will be a post with tips on, you guessed it, how to be like Snape. Now, it's not "How to be Snape", because no one but Snape can actually be Snape. You'll just have to try your best to be like him. Each week will have a different aspect of Snape, because you can't teach someone how to be like Snape in one day.
This Week: Walk like Snape
You can tell a lot about a person by the way they walk, and Snape walks knowing how people will judge him by it.
1. Your stride
When you walk, take long strides. Make it a point to step as far as possible without looking like you're trying to, but don't try to take too long of a stride. You'll either fall down or just look stupid, and Snape does neither of those things. Just go as far as you can. Your knees should only come up to halfway between where it normally is and your hip when you take a stride. Also, walk as fast as you can without running. If you're in a middle school, highschool, or college, you'll notice that everyone else seems to be taking really small strides and walking slow so they can talk to their friends. Well, Snape doesn't have any friends, so he doesn't do that. If you need to, maneuver around people. Think two steps ahead(pun intended) about where they'll be, and make a quick side-step that'll make you look both psychic and ninja-ish. Make sure your maneuvering steps are long strides as well, and you step to your toes. Stepping to your toes makes it easy to swivel and turn a different way if you need to.
2. Your arms
Don't swing your arms as much as others do; it makes the whole "long and fast strides" thing useless. It makes you look immature and you might hit someone in the face. The arm-shoulder angle shouldn't be any more than your leg-hip angle. However, it is important that you do swing your arms somewhat. If you're wearing a backpack, don't hold onto the straps, and try not to carry anything in your hands when you walk, except maybe a book or the hair of an insolent student. Having empty hands subconsciously makes everyone slightly more intimidated. It sort of gives them the feeling that you could punch or choke them at any second, and that you're willing to. (Trust me, I'm taking psychology. Besides, that's what Snape does!) If you notice someone you particularly hate while walking, don't be afraid to let your fist ball up, in case they might notice. Also, if you're heading toward a door to exit or enter someplace, hold your arm out in front of you to open it a second before you get there, so you don't have to stop.
3. Your posture
When walking, the last thing you want to do if you're trying to be like Snape is hunch over. You need to look confident when you walk, not depressed or insecure. (Well, actually, Snape's extremely depressed, but doesn't show it, obviously... especially not when he's walking!) Keep your torso as straight as possible, and chest in-line with your stomach and hips, instead of outward, like most would tell you. Suck in your gut if you're not thin, because Snape is tall and skinny. That's mainly why it's important to do these things. Don't raise your shoulders, because it's obvious, and it pushes your torso outward. Lastly, make sure not to turn your body to the left slightly when you step to the left, and vice versa. Keep your entire body facing forward when you walk, and step directly in front of where you stepped before(unless you're turning or maneuvering).
4. Your head/face
Like the rest of your body, your head should face forward the entire time you walk, unless you're changing directions. Don't turn to look at others or make eye contact with anyone. You should also keep your head perfectly aligned with your body and not crane your neck. Don't hold your head too high, or you'll look like Narcissa Malfoy, and this isn't a Narcissa blog. I don't even know if that exists. Anyway, retain the same facial expression the entire time you're walking: a scowl. Try not to look too pissed off, because you're not. You're just generally annoyed with all existence, mainly other people. Keep your brow furrowed and your lips pursed. Don't open your mouth unless you see something that particularly disgusts or annoys you, and you feel the need to snarl your lip.(There'll be more on facial expressions in a future HTBLS) Even though you're making it seem like you're not, do pay attention to what's going on around you. If someone starts staring at you, give them an evil glare without stopping, and they'll look away and feel embarrassed. If your hair gets in your eyes or somehow annoys you, jerk your head to flip it. Don't use your hands unless absolutely necessary. That tells everyone, "I'm too busy walking to even bother using my hands to flip my hair, so I'll just make it do exactly what I want with a simple head jerk. Also my hair's awesomer than yours."
All of these combined will put off a very Snape-ish aura. If you do it right, you'll be walking in a way that says, "I'm more important than all of you. You don't matter to me, nor does what you think of me. I hate every single one of you, whether I know you or not, as well as life. But I only care about mine(and possibly a select other few's), and right now my life requires me to go somewhere that I wasn't before. So don't look at me, don't come near me, don't expect me to acknowledge your existence, and don't expect me to care that I just accidentally bumped into you, because it's your fault."
Also, the Snape-style of walking is much more effective with a billowing cape.
This Week: Walk like Snape
You can tell a lot about a person by the way they walk, and Snape walks knowing how people will judge him by it.
1. Your stride
When you walk, take long strides. Make it a point to step as far as possible without looking like you're trying to, but don't try to take too long of a stride. You'll either fall down or just look stupid, and Snape does neither of those things. Just go as far as you can. Your knees should only come up to halfway between where it normally is and your hip when you take a stride. Also, walk as fast as you can without running. If you're in a middle school, highschool, or college, you'll notice that everyone else seems to be taking really small strides and walking slow so they can talk to their friends. Well, Snape doesn't have any friends, so he doesn't do that. If you need to, maneuver around people. Think two steps ahead(pun intended) about where they'll be, and make a quick side-step that'll make you look both psychic and ninja-ish. Make sure your maneuvering steps are long strides as well, and you step to your toes. Stepping to your toes makes it easy to swivel and turn a different way if you need to.
2. Your arms
Don't swing your arms as much as others do; it makes the whole "long and fast strides" thing useless. It makes you look immature and you might hit someone in the face. The arm-shoulder angle shouldn't be any more than your leg-hip angle. However, it is important that you do swing your arms somewhat. If you're wearing a backpack, don't hold onto the straps, and try not to carry anything in your hands when you walk, except maybe a book or the hair of an insolent student. Having empty hands subconsciously makes everyone slightly more intimidated. It sort of gives them the feeling that you could punch or choke them at any second, and that you're willing to. (Trust me, I'm taking psychology. Besides, that's what Snape does!) If you notice someone you particularly hate while walking, don't be afraid to let your fist ball up, in case they might notice. Also, if you're heading toward a door to exit or enter someplace, hold your arm out in front of you to open it a second before you get there, so you don't have to stop.
3. Your posture
When walking, the last thing you want to do if you're trying to be like Snape is hunch over. You need to look confident when you walk, not depressed or insecure. (Well, actually, Snape's extremely depressed, but doesn't show it, obviously... especially not when he's walking!) Keep your torso as straight as possible, and chest in-line with your stomach and hips, instead of outward, like most would tell you. Suck in your gut if you're not thin, because Snape is tall and skinny. That's mainly why it's important to do these things. Don't raise your shoulders, because it's obvious, and it pushes your torso outward. Lastly, make sure not to turn your body to the left slightly when you step to the left, and vice versa. Keep your entire body facing forward when you walk, and step directly in front of where you stepped before(unless you're turning or maneuvering).
4. Your head/face
Like the rest of your body, your head should face forward the entire time you walk, unless you're changing directions. Don't turn to look at others or make eye contact with anyone. You should also keep your head perfectly aligned with your body and not crane your neck. Don't hold your head too high, or you'll look like Narcissa Malfoy, and this isn't a Narcissa blog. I don't even know if that exists. Anyway, retain the same facial expression the entire time you're walking: a scowl. Try not to look too pissed off, because you're not. You're just generally annoyed with all existence, mainly other people. Keep your brow furrowed and your lips pursed. Don't open your mouth unless you see something that particularly disgusts or annoys you, and you feel the need to snarl your lip.(There'll be more on facial expressions in a future HTBLS) Even though you're making it seem like you're not, do pay attention to what's going on around you. If someone starts staring at you, give them an evil glare without stopping, and they'll look away and feel embarrassed. If your hair gets in your eyes or somehow annoys you, jerk your head to flip it. Don't use your hands unless absolutely necessary. That tells everyone, "I'm too busy walking to even bother using my hands to flip my hair, so I'll just make it do exactly what I want with a simple head jerk. Also my hair's awesomer than yours."
All of these combined will put off a very Snape-ish aura. If you do it right, you'll be walking in a way that says, "I'm more important than all of you. You don't matter to me, nor does what you think of me. I hate every single one of you, whether I know you or not, as well as life. But I only care about mine(and possibly a select other few's), and right now my life requires me to go somewhere that I wasn't before. So don't look at me, don't come near me, don't expect me to acknowledge your existence, and don't expect me to care that I just accidentally bumped into you, because it's your fault."
Also, the Snape-style of walking is much more effective with a billowing cape.
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