Weekly Snape-ly Event #18

If you follow Mugglenet, you'll know that the Harry Potter World Cup Tournament is happening. It's basically voting for your favorite character, but Tournament style.

You can vote for the first round here.

This is actually sort of stupid, because they're posting the awesome characters with stupid characters. I mean, Harry and Quirrell? Come on, do they think Quirrell has even a sliver of a chance of winning? Spoilers have told me that Snape will be paired with Crabbe for voting. Siriusly? Even Snape-haters wouldn't vote for Crabbe over him, because Crabbe sucks. We all know that Snape will ultimately win, and I know you guys will make sure of that.

Snape Picture of the Week #18

This week's picture goes along with a story, and that story is within this story:

The other night in MiM world, I was on Severus's page (as usual) and he had gotten drunk from drinking too much firewhiskey at the pool party and wedding. So me and my friends were hanging out with him in his office, and he decided to tell us this story:

"This tale takes place in Texas. I was wearing a cowboy hat and boots at the time...
On second thought, I don't want to tell it. It's too incriminating. Lucius would die of humiliation if he ever found out that I shared our little story with Fangirls.
Well, little known fact about me: I enjoy driving Muggle automobiles from time to time. Another little known fact: They're difficult to drive in the dark.
So we were driving along a rural road in San Antonio Texas late one night, and Lucius suddenly yelled at me to pull over... He wanted to steal a stop sign. The Dark Lord values trophies of mischief from the Muggle world.
So, I pulled the car over, and Lucius got out. He then climbed onto the roof, but it wasn't quite close enough to reach the sign. So I backed the car up, and then attempted to move closer. But I misjudged where the road ended and the ditch began. The whole car fell in.
Unfortunately, the ditch was full of rattlesnakes. You might ask why we didn't just raise the windows. Well, the air conditioning in the car was broken, and it was summertime in Texas! We had to make the choice between being eaten by rattlesnakes or suffocating in the heat! Scary, isn’t it?
So we took out our wands and fought our way out. Then we levitated the car out of the ditch. But it had a flat tire, and we weren't certain how to fix it. Eventually we were rescued by a tow truck driver. He charged us $27USD, and laughed at us for not knowing how to change a tire.
Unfortunately, we never did get the sign."

And here's the picture I drew the next day to go along with it:

Well, he passed out almost immediately after telling the story, and my friends and I stayed with him to protect his unconscious body from anyone that might have snuck out of bed. I ended up kissing him on the cheek and then falling asleep on him. He was not very happy in the morning. But he loved my picture.

Snape Products You Should Totally Buy #4

If you don't own one, you'll definitely want one. A Snape action figure. Now, I've noticed that there's a huge variety of Snape figures... Some of them are better quality than others, some look exactly like Alan Rickman while others don't, and some of them are stuck in one position while others can move their arms and legs. I'd really like one that can move his arms and legs, because they're so freaking adorable.

They also range in prices, the collectibles being more expensive. There's tons of websites that sell them, but Amazon's a good place, so I'll just link to there.

And if, for some reason, you didn't know that there were Snape action figures, here's a picture:

Sadly, his robes don't actually billow.

Fanfiction Friday #18

Sorry it's so late in the day, guys, but I was busy writing my own fanfiction.

For the first time, I have a crossover fic. And yes, it's a crossover with Twilight. But never fear, Snape's not paired with anyone... That would be disgusting. Actually, it's a Humor fic called Sparkles. It's one chapter, and it's not that long, but it's worth a read. Technically, you might not even consider it a crossover. There are only Twilight characters in an implied sense... And if I said anything else, I'd be giving away too much. Just go read it.

You know how when Voldemort "killed" Cedric Diggory, he became a vampire? Well, when he hit that one random tombstone, it turned into this link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6811533/1/Sparkles

Snape Quote of the Week #17

  And there he was, at a table right behind Harry. Harry stared. Snape-the-teenager had a stringy, pallid look about him, like a plant kept in the dark. His hair was lank and greasy and was flopping onto the table, his hooked nose barely half an inch from the parchment as he scribbled. Harry moved around behind Snape and read the heading of the examination paper:

Defense Against the Dark Arts--

Ordinary Wizarding Level

  So Snape had to be fifteen or sixteen , around Harry's own age. His hand was flying across the parchment; he had written at least a foot more than his closest neighbors, and yet his writing was minuscule and cramped.
~Order of the Phoenix, Ch. 28 "Snape's Worst Memory"

This may not seem significant at all, but this is the passage where I first felt close to Severus. This is exactly how I am during tests, timed essays, and pretty much every assignment. I'm always hunched over my desk with my face nearly pressing onto the paper. I've been like that ever since I started school... And people think I'm weird for doing it. It's partly a habit, partly because I don't anyone to copy off me, and partly because my eyesight isn't the best.

And my hair is never tucked back, so it always hangs over anything I'm writing. And no matter how much I wash it, it's still greasy... I used to hate it, but I feel proud to be like Severus.

And when I write, I write a lot. My handwriting's tiny, and I still manage to fill up over twice the amount of space as anyone else. I'm not lying at all... this is siriusly creepy. But also awesome. I'm pretty much a girl version of Snape. :D

Snape Insults YOU #17

Snape Insults Johnny Depp

Mister Depp, why is it that you cannot contain yourself in a single, sane personality? No, we would not like our hair cut by your deformed scissor-hands. And no, none of us celebrate our "un-birthdays." Nothing at Hogwarts is edible but the food, so would you please stop licking the walls?! And, Mister Depp, in a certain Muggle film, you kill me by repeatedly stabbing my jugular vein and letting me fall down a chute. What gives you the right to kill me? I deserved your wife, and you know it. I deserve all the ladies. 100 points from Gryffindor. Oh, and you as a pirate... it doesn't work for you. You have absolutely no idea how to be a real pirate... Let the expert, ergo me, show you how it's done:

Snape Video of the Week #17

Ministry of Magic- Lightning-Struck Tower

I think I've done all the MoM songs about Snape now... until they release their next album, which is sure to have more. I couldn't find any good music videos for this song... so you just get Jason dancing around.

Even though this song is from Harry's point of view and about what he's thinking after Snape kills Dumbledore, I can't help but love it. The Lightning-Struck Tower is one of the most pivotal chapter of the entire series... except it's Snape that I'm sad for, not Dumbledore. I don't know why, but I've never even gotten that sad at Dumbledore's death.

The thing about this song(as well as all MoM songs) is that even if you don't like Harry Potter, you have to appreciate the way the song comes together. The music is just awesome, and fits perfectly with the chapter. And I love how they incorporate actual quotes from the chapter...

Now that I think about it, this song can coincide with Hero Pt. 2, since they're both about the same thing, just from different points of view. I can't believe I never realized that before...